High fading, but want to stay up and play... Thinking about his body, his ripped abs, his deliciously huge equipment... I'm really longing for physical pleasure, but all that gets me going is either ad man or the memories that haunt me... not the ones that happened, no; i'm adding onto them in my twisted black desire... i have dark fantasies that bring me to extreme release, and want me to engage in very dangerous behavior... my past has left me shattered, and i crave violent sex and humiliation. Should I be "normal"? Concentrate on a "normal" object of masturbation, on the surface, a gorgeous man, or the ugly past that demands my attention like a spoiled child? Drives me to destruction?
I only know that whatever I do, it will be "wrong". And judged, as everything in this life is.
Casual
9 years ago
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